Living For Today

Time. It's such a funny dynamic, especially when it involves our kids. 

One minute we are wearing dark circles (thank you concealer) and are utterly exhausted from waking up several times nightly to feed them, wishing beyond hope for four hours of consecutive sleep.....The next moment we are holding back tears as they suddenly become "independent" and want to tuck their own-selves into bed....

One minute our backs are hurting from holding them all day and we secretly wish for the day when they will walk, even if its just for a second...the next day they running in circles and walking on our hearts... 

One minute they are barely stringing words together and we wish for the day when they can talk and we can understand what exactly it is that they are whining about...the next minute they are talking up a storm and we feel the "baby-ness"slowly drifting away...

Something tells me that one day my heart will feel a deep longing for "today." 

It will long for the days when I felt so fulfilled knowing that I was needed when a child cried out for mommy in the middle of the night. 

It will long for the days when our children were safe in the four walls of our home, away from the distractions and temptations of the world. 

It will long for the days when our children's biggest worry was whether or not we had any more fruit snacks. 

A few things I know for sure...

"Tomorrow" it probably won't seem as important to have the house immaculately clean in case an unexpected guest arrives. I will long for crushed up goldfish crackers and puzzle pieces on the floor. 

"Tomorrow" it probably won't seem as important to finally have all the socks matched and all the clothes folded and tucked away. I will reminisce about the children pretending to iron a basketful of clothes on their fake iron.

Tomorrow it won't matter whether or not I have seen the latest Facebook status of a friend I haven't talked to since high school. I will be looking through old pictures and videos of our sweeties.

Lord please help me soak these precious moments in with my children. Help me to remember to not take them for granted. 

Tomorrow she'll be teenager and too embarrassed to hold mommy's hand. Today I'm enjoying the moments when she holds my hand and says "let me show you mom" when she goes potty. 

Tomorrow he will replace his toys with a video game or a tv show. Today I'm enjoying the moments when we play with dinosaurs and he points out "ceritops" (triceratops) 

Tomorrow she will have her keys in her hand and will be headed out with friends. Today I'm enjoying the moments when Brooklyn just wants mommy to hold her, which is roughly 65% of the day. 

Tomorrow he will tower over me and I will look up at him instead of down at him. Today I'm enjoying the moments when I cradle him in my arms and tell him I'd like a "rib sandwich," while I tickle his sides until  he starts to hiccup :)

Tomorrow she will be going to the movies with a boyfriend. Today I'm enjoying the moments when we pop old fashioned popcorn and I introduced her to treasured Disney movies. 

Tomorrow he will be away at college in his dorm room. Today I'm enjoying the moments when he asks for "mommy" to tuck him in. 

Take a deep breath mommies.

Hold your children. 

Put your phone down. 

Look into their eyes when they talk to you. 

You're not going to get everything right 100% off the time. No one is perfect.  But I'm willing to bet that if you rely on The Lord and you look to his Word for guidance, you just might get it right a lot of the time. And pray, pray, pray.  :) 

Leave the mess there and play with baby dolls and build forts. Later the mess will be right there waiting. This precious time with your children won't be. 

Approaching age 2

I can't believe my two little ones will be TWO in a little over two months. What?! Where is all the time going?! That means we are almost halfway to preschool (if they go at age 4)....and that a year from now we will be half way to kindergarten....geez. Someone give me a chill pill already. :)

Brooklyn and Billy have been under the weather the past week. Brooklyn's nose started running on last Sunday and I could tell sickness was coming...Usually when one of our twins gets sick, the other one gets sick a few days later, and they share back and forth for a week or so until they are better. :) Welcome to life with two toddlers that are inseparable. Haha :)

Luckily, they are finally feeling better and are snoozing away right now without the assistance of mommy. When they are both sick, one of our twins sleeps like normal but the other one (who shall remain unnamed) has a really hard time resting. And s/he clings to mommy like no other. I'll let you guess which one that is. ;)

But alas, all is well again in the Helton household!

Billy and Brooklyn are growing so much right now. I looked at a picture of them from a year ago today and was caught off guard at just how much our "babies" have become toddlers. It tinges at my heart strings. I took them to my sister's hair shop last Friday and they got big boy and big girl haircuts. They sat in the chair with aprons on and suckers in hand, and did incredibly well. I think they enjoy being "big" kids.

They have started enjoying going on little excursions during the day, so they will bring me shoes (that are often mismatched and in completely different colors and styles) and will say in an adorable voice, "Outside?" So if the weather doesn't permit playing outside, we load up in the car and take a trip around the block or we go on a trip to McDonald's (Shh, don't tell healthy mommies) to grab a small fry or chocolate cookies. Don't worry, I try to limit fast food to once a week. Silence the alarms.

Billy IV has learned to "jump" and is quite the acrobat. He is going to be a basketball start one day. Just wait! Brooklyn Rose has recently started saying "love you" when I say it to her.

I. adore. my. children.

Please give me a remote so I can freeze time every now and then. Just for a second I promise. I try to soak up every smile, every hug, every giggle....but sometimes I still don't feel like that is enough. I snuggle with them when we first get up, I sing to them a good morning tune, I throw balls with Billy, I wrap up babies in blankets with Brooklyn....but sometimes I still don't feel like that is enough.

I know this is a little much, but to keep things in perspective, most mornings I take a second to imagine Billy and Brooklyn being off at college one day, and it really helps me to live in the moment. I then proceed to give them one thousand sugars and tell them "I love you" a few hundred times. :) My time with my two little ones is so precious to me and so dear to my heart.

Just a thought provoking question for the mommies out there, but how many of you actually "play" with your children? I mean, like, taking a break from your household chores/putting down the phone or computer/"getting down on the floor and playing with them?" I try to follow the rule of thumb that in each hour, I devote 45 min of undivided attention to the twins for every 15 minutes I spend on a household task. This helps me to keep a sense of balance and to not feel guilty for taking time away from them to do things I need to get done. Is this always this case? No. But do I feel incredibly peaceful and at ease when it is? Yes.

Ordinary Expectations

The majority of us almost can't help but take things for granted. We are the lucky ones. The ones that have progressed thus far in life without any major hiccups, losses, and/or trials. We wake up each morning to a house with four walls, food in the pantry, healthy babies with sweet smiles and full bellies....There are so many moments and situations in our every day lives that we should praise God for, but so often, whether it be because of routine, exhaustion, a sense of entitlement, or whatnot, we count them as ordinary and lose sight of just how much God is working for good in our lives.

What are genuine blessings, we view as ordinary expectations.

Someone once told me those with the greatest faiths have faced the greatest trials.

I recently came across a blog entitled Avery's Bucket List which is about a precious child who was born with muscular spinal atrophy and whose parents have been told she will only live for approximately 18 more months. Here is a quote from her blog:

"Imagine you've been diagnosed with an incurable genetic disease and you are told you will not only lose your ability to walk and move your arms, but you will die between now and the next 18 months. What would you do?"

I spent an hour or so reading through her blog, with tear-filled eyes and an aching heart, looking at her sweet pictures, and reviewing her "bucket list" of things to do before she leaves this world.

Did you take time today to thank God for your ability to walk, to use your arms, to hold your children? Did you take time to pray about how thankful you are for the good health of your little ones? For their ability to zip through the grass, to reach out to you with open arms, to feed themselves their food, to give you precious smiles?

So many things in our lives we view as ordinary expectations.

April 27th 2011 was a devasting day for so many familes. The tornadoes that ripped through numerous states caused catastrophic destruction, particulary across the state of Alabama. A total of 208 tornadoes were confirmed that day. I was in Arab visiting my family when a few of the tornadoes touched down in areas in and around Arab. I have never been more fearful in my life. A tornado several years prior had destroyed a home a few down from ours, and flashes of that memory echoed in my mind as we put a mattress in the foyer and knelt together with our twins. Later that day, a family with a set of twins that share the same birthday as ours would lose five family members, including one of their precious twins. Through the grace of God, the other twin survived and went on to make a full recovery. This past Friday, on the anniversary of those tornadoes, I spent a few moments in tears thinking about that particular family, as our twins are the same age as theirs on this date last year (they are a year apart). So many people started that day like any other day, making coffee, grabbing a shower, heading to work...

So many things in our lives we view as ordinary expectations.

Take time to tell your spouse how much you love them today. Give your child an extra kiss and hug. Hold them a little longer before they go to bed. Write the thank-you note you have been meaning to write. Go enjoy ice cream with your family. Put down the computer and turn off the tv and focus on your precious blessings from our Lord.

May we never lose sight of just how much the Lord loves us and has blessed us. May we not take one single day for granted. May we love, cherish, and appreciate those around us in the way God intended us to do so.

Colossians 3:15-17 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Luke 6:38 Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.

1 Corinthians 16:14 Let all that you do be done in love.

Dear Lord,
Thank you so much for my wonderful husband and for my two precious children. Thank you for providing me with a husband that works hard every day to support our family, who sets the alarm clock to get us up on Sunday mornings, who loves me unselfishly and tells me I am beautiful when I haven't had a shower and am in pajamas with no make-up on. Thank you for providing us with two healthy babies that we cherish, love and adore with all our hearts. They are the two biggest blessings of our lives. Please give them long and fruitful lives in your service. Please protect our family and help us to focus on you each and every day. May we always give you the glory. Amen.

Billy IV has always been easy on mommy. I can remember during the pregnancy, Brooklyn would be moving and moving, and he would pitter patter here and there but for the most part just floated around quietly and comfortably. I guess I should say though, in Brooklyn's defense, that she was stuck by a membrane the entire pregnancy and couldn't turn over. Bless her.

I remember one time, after reading a few absolutely terrifying stories about twin pregnancies (stay away from the computer at all costs if you are expecting), I became worrisome because Billy wasn't moving around a lot. So I teared up slightly and put my hand on my tummy ever so softly and told him mommy was worried, so if he could give me a high five or a soccer kick I would be so appreciative. Within seconds I felt a soft nudge right underneath my hand. He captured that much more of my heart in that moment.

When he was born and had to spend some time in the NICU, he would look up at you with the darkest of dark brown eyes and they would absolutely melt your heart. He is our "tough cookie." Even with the wires and the tubes, he rarely fussed. He had moments where he couldn't even keep 1 cc of milk down, and at the time I didn't realize how rough that really was, until I later saw preemies that were much younger keeping much more than that down. And then there was the time when we had to carry him to Vandy a few months after he was born in order to ensure all the bells and whistles were working correctly in his heart. Tough stuff for an mommy, and especially a mommy as sensitive as I am.

Billy absolutely adores big sister. Neither one of them can get too far without checking on the other one. If she starts to fuss during a diaper change he will bring her sippy cup to her, or if he sees her pacifier lying around he will bring it over. I adore their closeness. I think of moments in our own lives when we feel lonely or insecure, and am so thankful to know that they have been together from the very beginning, nudging each other in the womb, and now smiling, giggling, and playing together each day. They are so lucky.

Billy has been a good sleeper from about the age of six months or so. He loves his crib and typically sleeps so well at night. He is also independent and plays very well by himself. He shares toys exceptionally well and is very easily entertained. He is such a sweet soul. He gets a big grin on his face anytime Billy III gives me a hug or a kiss. If you think your kids aren't affected or influenced by your marriage relationship, think again.

When the twins were much younger and Brooklyn was more needy, he often made it seem as though I had the equivalent of one kiddo when it came to the amount of work involved because he was so easy.

As of a few weeks ago, Billy became much more of a mama's boy. He will often come to me during the day and sit in my lap, and he smiles and gives me sugars if I kneel down for one. Melts. My. Heart.

I can already tell that Billy is going to be the type of individual that thinks before he speaks, makes sure everyone is included, and is soft and gentle with others hearts. He is very much so a typical boy though! He spends most hours of the day throwing, shooting, and chasing basketballs or trying to carefully wrestle with mommy. The twins are, for the most part, night and day when it comes to their favorite toys.

Billy holds such a big piece of my heart. When I think of my greatest and most sincere moments in my mere 26 years, I think of a tiny figure in dinosaur pajamas, red hair and sweet smiles, giggles that turn into hiccups, hearing the word "mama", and precious hugs for no reason at all. You may have your daddy's looks Billy IV, but you have your mama's eyes! I love you so much!

Brooklyn Rose

And thou shalt in thy daughter see,
This picture, once, resembled thee.
~Ambrose Philips

I always make sure I include each twin in my blog posts so I don't feel like I am cheating the other and since I of course adore them the same amount, but I thought I would do this one specifically on Brooklyn (and do one just on Billy IV in the future). For those of you that don't know, she may in fact be the biggest mama's girl on this side of the universe. If you think I'm kidding, come spend a day at our house. It sometimes means a little more "work" (if you could possibly call what I do work) but is incredibly precious to me, and has been so good for my heart and soul.

Every single day, Brooklyn wants to be right with mommy, doing what mommy is doing.

She helps me wipe the counter, she helps me poor milk, she brushes my hair while I blow it dry, she helps me put lids on containers, she brushes her teeth while I brush mine, she tests the water coming out of the faucet for bath time after I do, she sprinkles cheese on casseroles before they go in oven, she starts laughing and/or smiling just because I am doing so.

Often as she drifts off to sleep, she will put one hand on my arm to make sure I am there, and there have been a few occasions when I nearly (and do) tear up thinking about just how much she loves and needs me, as all children need their mommies. That is a fact. I have come to learn that a mother/daughter bond is so special. It's hard to believe that I used to think I only wanted a house full of boys. God knows our needs much better than we do.

While I do want her to have independence, it brings hundreds of smiles to my face each day. Like hundreds of thousands of daughters, Brooklyn wants to be just like mommy. And with that comes some self-reflection, similar to what I wrote about in a blog a few weeks ago. If Brooklyn wants to be just like mommy, do I, in turn, truly want her to be like me? Am I showing her on a daily basis what truly is important?

When a drink spills on the floor after an earlier than expected start to our morning, how do I react? Before meals, do I take time to pray? I see her look at me curiously and inquisitively when I do. What does my expression convey and what do I say first thing in the morning? How often do I give reassuring hugs and kisses? How much time do I spend on her level, playing with dolls, exploring, looking at animal cards, walking her play doggy?

And beyond that....How I do treat friends that are my age? How do I treat family? Do I give to others or do I hold back? Am I a source of encouragement? Do I place emphasis on worldly desires or spirituality?

If you didn't beforehand, I hope you, like me, did (and continually do) a little self-reflection as a parent. May we never stop growing and maturing in our faith!

Brooklyn Rose,
From the moment I first saw you, I knew that I would be your mother first, but that secondly, we would be dear friends. You have brought so many smiles to my face and caused so many giggles in my voice. You have tugged at my heart and soul and have made me feel so loved and fulfilled. I can still remember talking to you when you were three months old, when you were crying as sweet babies sometimes do, and letting you know that mommy would always be right here for you, and it was as though you clearly understood me, and from that point on, you have been an absolute mommy's girl. Like when I was a little girl, you adore kittys, books, and babydolls. It is so precious to see you rock your babies and pat them softly on the back. Since you look so much like mommy, I can't help but sometimes feel like I am in a time-warp, watching myself at your age many years ago. Thank you for the way you say mommy, for how often you run to me with outstreched arms, for helping me with daily tasks, for the books you bring me to read to you during the day...I pray for you and brother every single night. I pray that God will help daddy and me show you His wonderful love, that He will give you a long and fruitful life in His service, that you will one day find a spouse that will help you in your Christian walk...May you always know that little brother and you are my world and that I love you both so dearly!

Easter 2012

On Sunday, the Helton Four enjoyed Easter by attending church and then going to Netty and Big Daddy's house for a yummy lunch. Netty made a delicious meal including chicken and rice casserole, ham, homemade mac and cheese, green beans, baked beans, corn on the cob, fried okra, rolls, and my favorite, grape salad. I probably missed a few menu times. I am always so in awe of her! I certainly over-ate and was miserable for a few hours. :) The twins wore their matching green smocked Easter bunny outfits. It is so much fun having twins and getting to put them in matching outfits (while they will still let me, lol). After lunch, it was already an hour past the twins nap time so we headed on home and they are going to hunt Easter eggs tonight. Might as well keep the holiday going! :)

I was laughing today looking around at all the twins toys around the house. The living room has literally been taken over by toys. Not to mention the kitchen area and their room. It won't be long before we'll have to join in with someone having a yard sale and sell some of their toys to upgrade to the next ones. Now that they are both walking well they are ready for tall/more advanced toys. I'm looking forward to hopefully getting them a tent, tunnel, sand and water station, and mini pool so we can spend some time outdoors when it warms up again. They LOVE the outdoors. They have been scared of grass until recently, but now they love it! Billy is as cool as a cucumber but Brooklyn will start squirming and moving back and forth if I try to get her up to take her inside. She is a free spirit and loves to roam in wide open spaces. (And has a tiny temper and is a little rotten ;))

Billy IV still spends several hours during the day shooting basketballs in his basketball goal and throwing/chasing balls all over the house. He is most definitely going to be a baseball or basketball player. He just has a genuine love for it. He is just like his daddy as a little boy. :) To be honest, they are each our mirror image when we were that age. Brooklyn loves books, kittys, and babies and those were the three things I was crazy about as a toddler/child. It is so funny to see how similar they are to each of us. All while we haven't encouraged one thing or the other.

Brooklyn has started getting really good with her words, animal sounds, and needs/gestures. She has been meowing like a kitty all week and now tells me if she has had a poo-poo. haha She said the word car for the first time today. Billy now brings me his cups/bowls if he wants something more to drink or grapes and he gives me such a look of adoration when I get him this or that and he sees that I know what he wants. It is the sweetest thing. It must be so nice to feel so understand after trying to learn to communicate over the past year and a half. :) He is such a sweet soul. I showed the twins a picture of my mom and dad a few days ago and he got the kindest look in his eyes and on his face. He gives his cousin Gracie sweet grins and sugars. I think the twins would continually shower Gracie with sugars if I let them. Bless her. lol

Last Thursday night we had the twins and Gracie by ourselves for the first time and they all did so well. I was a little nervous about Brooklyn becoming jealous because she is quite the mama's girl, but it was as though she understood little Gracie needed to be taken care of. She sat at my feet while I rocked Gracie and then held my hand while we walked her back to the crib for a little snooze. It is rewarding to see your children growing and learning in these ways. Billy IV stayed close to Gracie during her visit and made sure she had plenty to do and was taken care of. I can tell he is going to be so sweet and protective of her. Gracie played and played and was so good during her visit. She was a breeze! Looks like we could have handled triplets. Umm let's not get ahead of ourselves!!! JUST kidding!!!

The twins are in a bit of a separation anxiety phase right now. Brooklyn has been in one for a few months but Billy recently joined the ranks. They both immediately start crying when we enter their Bible class room at church on Wednesdays/Sundays. Bless them. I know it will pass. So thankful that they have such good teachers! A shout-out to Jennette, Emily, Mindy, and Shelly!

Don't tell daddy, but Billy has recently turned into a tad bit of a mama's boy. I think it has been since our Arab trip two weekends ago when he spent lots of extra time with mommy. Sporadically during the day, he will suddenly come to me and put his arms around me for a few minutes, and then will give me sugars. I. eat. it. up. He has always been more independent (which I am appreciative of since Brookie is a little more dependent), but it is nice to seeing him loving on mommy so much. They have started fighting over sitting in my lap at certain times during the day and both were reaching for/whining for me at the same time during church yesterday morning. Bliss.

I love my two little ones so much! So thankful to be with them and to see all their little changes day by day!

16 month check-up!

Today was shot day for the Helton twins. I always get a little anxious before these visits, because while Billy IV handles them pretty well, Brooklyn does not. The last two shot visits, she has cried and cried and been so upset. :( Bless her. Billy IV is my tough little man and Brooklyn is our diva gal. :)

The doctor was very pleased with how the twins are growing. Billy weighed 20 lbs 5 oz and was 31 inches tall. Brooklyn weighed 21 lbs 6 oz and was 30.5 inches tall. I am very proud that their tummies are finally starting to "hang over" their pants a tad. :)

Billy IV was talking up a storm and smiling while the doctor visited with us. I love his level of independence and how easily he entertains himself. Brooklyn sat firmly in mommy's lap with her arms around me. Ha. Gotta love a genuine mommy's girl. There are true blessings to both scenerios. :)

Surprising (and thankfully), the twins handled their shots really well! They each only cried for a minute or two. I was SO relieved. It absolutely breaks my heart for them to have to get them but I know it is entirely necessary.

After their check-up, we treated them to the donut shop. The owner was so sweet and as we got ready to leave with our sweets in hand, she gave them each a donut hole to enjoy on the car trip home. They had glaze smeared all over their faces and little hands when we got home. It was precious.

We spent the day playing with toys, talking to our kitty, going on a long walk in our jogging stroller (LOVING this weather and being able to get out and about- I could see each of the twins dancing their little feet back and forth while we were strolling along), eating popsicles, and watching cartoons. I could tell the twins were a little uncomfortable tonight and were ready to turn it in for the night a little earlier than normal.

They are now sleeping soundly. :) All in all, I consider it a good day despite the shots! Tonight I was thinking about all our blessings and how thankful I am to have two healthy, happy one year olds. Thank you Lord for watching over our family! I don't take a single bit of it for granted!

Adoration

I can't help but absolutely adore my two little ones...I absolutely eat up every single moment I have with them.

From Billy's sly grin when he climbs up on top of a toy for the tenth time (which he knows it is a no-no), to Brooklyn patting my back while giving me a hug.

From Billy's loud giggles as he barrels down the hallway chasing after a ball, to Brooklyn's sweet grin as she says kitty-kitty while looking out the front door.

From Brooklyn following me from room to room and sticking her fingers under the door while I'm in the bathroom, to Billy dancing up and down when one of his favorite Bubble Guppies episodes come on.

From Brooklyn wanting mommy, and only mommy at certain times, to Billy suddenly having the sweetest expression across his face and surprising me with a sugar.

Even when Brooklyn is kicking and huffing because she doesn't want to sit still in the church pew, or Billy gets his feelings hurt because he isn't allowed to climb to the highest point in the room, I love them so incredibly much.

These are the days.

Is it possible to adore your children too much? I think not.

Even when they are acting like little Indians and I have to discipline them, I love them that much more.

They are constantly filling my heart with so much tenderness, my actions with so much affection, my soul with so much fulfillment, my prayers with so much fervor.

I have never felt more loved or more counted on than I do now.

The stage the twins are in gets more and more fun each day. I am endlessly thrilled by each new word I hear and each new reaction I see as they explore the world around them. Children have a way of allowing us to break apart our busy lives into small segments, and they teach us to appreciate the smallest of things. Brooklyn got the biggest satisfaction out of carrying around an empty KFC box today. Billy adored the fact that he got to carry around a capri-sun drink.

With each new day, my eyes open a little more and I see just how much they are watching Billy and I, and sweetly, just how much they want to be like us and do the things we do. It gives way to a little self-examination. Exactly what am I showing them is important? How do I react when the going gets tough? What are the expressions I give? What am I showing them regarding how a husband/wife relationship should be? How often do I tell them about our Lord and His love for them? It is never too early to set a good example. Especially in the world we live in today.

Parenthood comes with some serious responsibilities.

It still amazes me to think about how far we have come over the last sixteen months. All the sleepless nights and fussy spells and sickness. It's hard to believe Brooklyn will sleep for ten hours at night and Billy gobbles up his food so well at mealtime.

I pray every night that God will give them long and fruitful lives in His Service.

Dear Lord,
Thank you so much for the two biggest blessings and accomplishments of my life. Everything I did prior to November 18th 2010 carries so little comparison and meaning to the day my precious twins entered this world and became my life's work. Please be with Billy and I and give us the knowledge, patience, and know-how to lead them to You through our consistency, our gentleness, our love. I take time everyday to kiss Billy's short, chubby feet and to hold Brooklyn's small hand. I pray that one day they will meet strong Christian mates and that they will grow together in Christ and will have a happy, Christ-centered home. May we always remember James 1:17 and always give You the glory. Amen.

St Louis Trip and updates on the twins!

The twins are getting bigger and bigger these days! I still refer to them as babies, but I guess when Billy IV starts walking full-time I will have to own up and refer to them as toddlers. He is up to sixteen steps so far. He does things on his own time. He carries around his basketballs on the back of his legs and will crawl everywhere with them. It is quite the skill. And he is mad fast at crawling, so I suppose he sees no need to walk. Secretly, I think he knows it will be hard on mommy for Brooklyn and he to not offically be "babies" anymore so he is being kind and crawling for my benefit. ;)

A little over a week ago Netty and Big Daddy kept the twins Thursday night through Sunday night so Billy and I could go on a anniversary/Halloween convention trip. Ah yes, Halloween. My husband is obsessed. Every year in March, there is a huge Halloween convention in St Louis, MO. I think this year was it's 17th year running (my husband will correct me if I am wrong). They have hundreds of vendors there. Billy was literally like a kid in a candystore. When we got out of the car, I literally had to hold his hand tightly to keep him from sprinting off to it. For once in my life, I held the credit cards. :) There were so many scary creatures there! Apparently I must look sweet and innocent, because all the owners of the vendors would see me coming and as we passed by they would suddenly push a button and BOOM! Some scary creature would jump out. I could seriously feel them watching me as I strolled along and got closer. They would be in the middle of ringing up a purchase and ta-da! A mechanical dog would jump out of it's cage or a monster would come storming out of a coffin. I tried to contain myself but jumped at least twice. Several people thought it was funny. :)


(The B&B we stayed at- I LOVE homes like this!)

Billy got several good ideas during the trip. He wants to have a haunted house/trail a few years from now. I definitely think it is something he can and will achieve. Every year he purchases a few props and builds several of his own. He is great with money and has some great plans so I am looking forward to scaring the people of Lawrenceburg and surrounding communities one day. :)

While we were in St Louis, we also enjoyed some amazing meals and I did a little shopping. I had been deathly sick the week before, and some of the sickness was still lingering but I made it through. It was nice to relax and to take it easy.

I definitely missed the twins though! When we got back to Biff and Penny's house to pick them up, I was out of the car in a flash and had them in my arms smothering them with kisses. Sorry kids. :) Billy and Brooklyn are my WORLD. Everything I do revolves around them. I am so thankful to have to a wonderful set of second parents like Biff and Penny. I don't even refer to or think of them as in-laws. They genuinely treat Adam and I like we are one of their own. That is a rarity and such a blessing. They have done so much for us, and we will have some huge shoes to fill one day when it comes our turn. And I will absolutely ensure we do the same. :)

It was nice for Billy and I to have some time to ourselves and to have the opportunity to "miss" the twins. I am of course with them 24/7 and I will admit that on those rare occasions, I do get a little exhausted and need a little time for mommy. I think the twins enjoyed having time with Netty and Big Daddy as well. When we all got home and I was helping Brooklyn get to sleep, she put her little hand on my face as she drifted off and I absolutely knew that I am right where I am supposed to be at this point in my life. I have never felt more loved or needed than I do right now. And it is such a blessing. Billy IV will often give me a big ole grin and start laughing and I can tell in his dark brown eyes how much he loves mommy. It melts my heart. :)

The twins are playing so well during the day and are saying more and more words. I am so proud of them. Brooklyn walks here, there and everywhere and I can tell she thinks she is at least 16. Billy climbs this, that, and everything. :) He is like his daddy! So thankful for these two little ones!

Easy Breezy

Every stage with the twins is new and fun, but I must say that at 15 months old, these are my most favorite days ever. I am not accustomed to how easy our days are now! I am so impressed with my sweeties! I think I have been so used to running around like a wild Indian grabbing bottles, changing diapers, feeding babies, and picking up toys that I forgot how to sit still and simply relax. And I actually get so much rest at night now that I don't even need to take a nap when they do during the day. WOW. Never thought that would happen. :) Billy typically sleeps for 11 hour stints and Brooklyn sleeps in at least 8 or more hour stints (she occasionally stirs about 30 minutes after bedtime but will then go back to sleep and stay asleep). I feel so blessed and do not take it one bit for granted.

We have officially made it over that hump of exhaustion that we (enjoyably of course) experienced over the first year. I feel quite accomplished. :)

These days, the twins are saying more and more words and they are playing so well during the day. There are times when Brooklyn will just come sit in my lap for fifteen minutes or more, or Billy will lay on his sleeping bag and just simply hang out, and it is so nice! They also understand me clearly. If I ask Brooklyn to bring me a book or her baby doll, she will go grab one or the other and bring it back. Or if I ask Billy if he is hungry or wants a bite-bite (food) he will come to me or go to his high chair. Easy breezy.

The only real struggle we have is getting them to sit still during worship service. Whew they hate being confined! And I understand. I have been trying to pull out all the stops though and it is getting easier. :)

Billy IV told me he loved me for the first time last night. Since the day they were born, I have told the twins I love them thousands of times (literally), and to see him make eye contact with me and say those words melted me into a puddle of mush. God is so good!

I am so thankful for these two amazing blessings!

14 months!!!

Well, one of my New Year's resolutions was to write on my blog three times a week....

Well, er, then we all got sick. Repeatedly.

I feel so sorry for the twins. One will get sick, have it a few days, and then the next one will get sick and have it for a while. I don't think they have went more than three weeks since November without getting sick....bless them. But mommy and daddy are taking extra good care of them and giving them lots of love and attention. :)

These days, it seems like the twins are growing SO fast. It used to be that I would seem to see changes week to week, and now it as though I am seeing them minute to minute.

Brooklyn is a WALKER now. Ah yes, at 14 months. :) She has reached the point where she prefers walking over crawling and stands up like it is nothing. I can tell she thinks she is big to do, and she IS. Brooklyn looks eerily like me in my baby pictures, and I can't describe how good it makes me feel to see brown-eyed Brooklyn toddling around in her princess pj's with a doll in hand. There is something so special about that...sometimes I feel like I am watching myself from 25 years ago. Minus the "diva" aspect. Yes indeed. This is Brooklyn's world and we are living in it. ;) haha I am super laid-back about things, so most the time it just makes me giggle more than anything. But I can tell we are going to have to work with her a tad in the good ole discipline department. Patience grasshopper as Billy III would say! :) But she is just as loving too. She gives more hugs and kisses than any other toddler I have ever seen. And it is so precious to see her rock her babies and give them sugars. She is also developing into a "mama" for Billy IV, which I knew would happen eventually. She will bring him his pacifier if she sees it laying around and will put it in his mouth for him (He always smiles really big). Or during bathtime, if she sees that he is fussing (he suddenly isn't a fan of baths) she will pick up a water toy and hand it to him. But along with being a "mama" to him in that way, she is also attempting to be a mama in other ways too, lol. For instance, the other day Billy was standing up by the couch watching Bubble Guppies from the laptop and she decided it was best that he not be touching the couch, so she carefully (and softly) removed his hands from it. Um, no ma'am. :) haha I have an older sister, so just as much as I adore Brooklyn, I adore Billy just the same and am serious about making sure Billy doesn't experience the younger-child syndrome (yes, one minute makes a difference- I'm telling you). So it is a sweet dynamic. :) But they are both so precious and I can tell they genuinely love and appreciate each other.

Billy still prefers to speed crawl over walking. He sees Brooklyn walking around, and quickly speeds by on all fours. :) Oh, he says, whats the big deal? He will walk when he gets ready! He is so good with his vocabulary right now. I have come to believe he can repeat any word that he feels like repeating. The other day, Billy III asked him if he would like Lucky Charms cereal, and he said "Lucky Charms" like he had said it a million times before. He is also good at repeating animal sounds. He can say woof woof, moo moo, growl like a lion, etc. Right now his main words are Boo (our dog), bite bite (for more food), daddy (naturally-he is a daddy's boy), horse, kitty, and there are a slew of other words. He says them with such ease. He is such a sweetheart. He has a laid back demeanor and typically just goes with the flow these days. He rarely fusses and just plays and plays. I am so proud of him. He recently got some new toddler clothes (along with sis), and he looks so handsome in them! His hair still has a reddish tint, and I am SO hopeful that it will stay around. Please please please! :)

The twins typically play really well together (I would say around 85% of the time we are good to go) but we have just entered a "non-sharing" phase, or possessive stage, whatever you want to call it. I read through some of my books and it said the typically child doesn't genuinely understand what sharing means until around the age of 2.5-3. Okay, so we are roughly 1 year away. :) haha They do understand no-no though and that it is not appropriate to take things from one another. That is the interesting thing with two, we are going to experience phases much sooner than other singletons. And I completely understand. I wasn't a fan of sharing my toys all the time either. haha

I am so proud of my two little ones. They are growing, learning, and developing so quickly. I am soaking these moments in!!!

Made from scratch chocolate croissants- Recipe #1 of 52 new recipes for the new year.

Ever since seeing the movie It's Complicated, I have been obsessed with making chocolate croissants from scratch. Since one of my new year's resolutions is to make one new recipe a week for the full year, I thought why not start off 2012 with a bang! So I researched several recipes, picked one out, and went right to work.

Making croissants is a little bit time-consuming (you have breaks in between the dough chilling), but it is super easy and totally worth it. They are SO much better than store-bought crescent rolls and don't have that fake butter taste like the ones in the frozen foods section. Eek.

Here is the recipe I selected! It was borrowed from chickensintheroad.com.

Step 1
1 1/3 cups cold butter
3 cups all-purpose flour

Cut butter into 1/2-inch slices. Mix with 3 cups flour in a bowl and chill while preparing Step 2.

Step 2
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 package yeast
1 1/4 cups milk
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 egg

Combine 1 1/2 cups flour and yeast in a large mixing bowl. Meanwhile, heat milk, sugar and salt in a pan on the stove till warm. Add to yeast-flour mixture along with the egg. Beat with an electric mixer for 30 seconds on low, then on high for 3 minutes.

Step 3
Stir in chilled butter-flour mixture. Flouring hands, knead dough very gently, punching about eight times. Using a floured rolling pin, roll out on a floured surface into a large rectangle (about 20 inches by 10 inches). Fold dough into thirds, wrap, and refrigerate for at least 1 1/2 hours or overnight (or freeze for 30 minutes).

Step 4
Take dough out of refrigerator. Using a floured rolling pin again, roll dough out on a floured surface into a rectangle as described in Step 3. Fold, wrap, and chill dough again, this time for at least 4 hours or overnight.

Step 5
Remove dough from refrigerator and divide into fourths (*I did mine in thirds) by cutting the dough. Shape each piece into a ball. At this point, you can either use the dough right away, refrigerate it for up to a week, or freeze it for later use. Wrap balls in plastic wrap and store inside a Ziploc baggie. Thaw frozen dough to use. To use immediately, put on a floured surface and using a floured rolling pin, roll out dough into a circle.

I floured my working surface, rolled a third of the dough into a very thin pizza shape with a floured rolling pin, cut it into 12 pizza-slice shapes, and then put chocolate chips on the fat end of each slice of dough. Then I rolled them up, pinched the ends together, and placed them on a greased baking sheet.

Next, I whisked an egg white with one tablespoon of water and brushed each croissant with it.

Finally, I sprinkled each croissant with a little salt, preheated the oven to 375 and baked them for 10-15 minutes.

All done and super delicious!!!

There is something about making your own bread that makes you feel like a legitimate homemaker. Sure made me proud. Haha I was so worried that they wouldn't come out right but they were perfect. So if I can do it, then that means you can.

Letting Go and Letting God

As another year passes me by and a new one begins, I can't help but think of the importance of "Letting Go and Letting God." This quote has always been of significance to me. It is all to easy to become wrapped up in every-day worries and concerns and to lose focus on our Lord. I wish I had a "counter" of sorts so I could see just how much time I spend worrying about the health and future of our twins, the spiritual life of family members, finances, a clean house...

It is a tad bit tiring to even think about, but also a form of release just to be able to get my worries out in the open. What do you worry about? What is interfering with your ability to fully trust in God and to know that you are His child and that He loves you and will take care of you? What is it time to finally let go of?

Jim Elliot, a missionary that was martyred for his faith (not sure of his exact faith, but found significance in his quote), said the following a few months prior to his death: "He is no fool who gives up what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose."

The Bible supplies us with numerous verses about worry, anxiety, and fear. Something tells me God knew it would be a problem for a lot of us. :) Especially us women.

Luke 12:25 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?

Psalm 55:22 Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

When we spend time in worry and try to control our lives, we move further and further from Christ. And if we get jumbled up enough, it can take a significant event to get us back on track. Have you ever prayed about something over and over that worried you or made you anxious just to see it continue to not going your way? Maybe that is your answer.

So what to do with all this worry? Let Go and Let God. Pray about it. Talk to your spouse about it. Just simply vocalizing our worries to someone we love and trust is a release. Take action and make a change for the better!

To the New Year!

2011 brought a lot of good memories our way. And with two fresh faces in our home, a few lessons in parenthood as well. :) I learned when it is time to move up in diapers (eek), the perfect bottles to use, how important it is to nap when your sweeties do (if possible), the perfect rocking technique for each twin, their favorite foods, and LOTS more. I have also learned that having children makes you less selfish and more spiritual, less insecure and more comfortable in your own skin, and it fills gaps in your life that you never knew were there and makes you feel so fulfilled.

God has blessed us so much, and I can't help but feel a little undeserving. I still remember how excited I was to see Billy IV roll over for the first time at fourth months this year, and then how thrilled I was to hear Broooklyn say da-da on an afternoon stroll through the neighborhood at five months. I was so proud to see Billy IV army crawl (faster than you could imagine) for the first time at 8 months and then for Brooklyn to take slow, exaggerated crawls on her knees while she was still holding onto a little baby fat at nine months. haha I suppose we will see our first steps in 2012!

I feel so incredibly proud of the two individuals they are becoming.

We had our 12 month check-up this past Thursday, and I must say, it was HORRIBLE. Six shots and two foot pricks were just about enough to put this tough mommy under. Billy handled his shots pretty well, but poor Brooklyn cried and cried. I could tell her feelings were really hurt. I cried right along with her. As a mother, it is of course my natural instinct to protect my sweeties from any possible pain. And while I know the shots were necessary, it didn't make them any easier. But at least we went one for two regarding how they handled them. The nurses gave them suckers afterwards, and Billy immediately cheered up and gave the impression that he would take on another shot if it meant he got another sucker. It was so sweet. He is a tough cookie like his mama. I can tell he is going to have a high tolerance for pain.

The twins are coming along! Brooklyn weighed 19 lbs 15 oz and was 29.5 inches long. Billy weighed 18 lbs 12oz and was 29.5 inches. Brooklyn is headed towards the 50th percentile but Billy still has a ways to go. But he will get there! I was always a skinny minny growing up, and I think he has a little in common with mommy.

During 2012, I plan to make a few changes to my blog (if I can keep up). I am going to divide it in three sections and write three times a week. I am going to write about spiritual life on Mondays, new recipes that are tried and true on Wednesdays, and then I am going to do a general update on the Helton household on Fridays. It is mainly something I am doing for me so I have a little "project." :) Now let's see if I can stick to it!

Happy New Year! I hope this year brings many wonderful blessings your way!

Joy in the simple things

It's hard to believe my two "babies" are 13 months now. The other night they were standing up by the changing table in their room, and I caught a glimpse of how much longer they have gotten in length, and it tugged at my heart a little.

With each new day, I get to see new expressions, hear new words, and witness new areas of growth in their development. And it is happening so quickly.

Right now, the twins favorite menu items consist of apples and chicken, mashed potatoes, macaroni and cheese, grapes, goldfish crackers, and mixed berries. We have quite a time getting the twins to eat as much as the "charts" say they should. ;) I often refer to it as my "patience builder." haha But as we introduce more and more table foods, it is becoming easier and they are eating better.

One of my favorite moments with the twins right now is when we get out of the car with them after going on a car ride and arriving at a location. It always makes me smile to see them pop their heads up and look around to see where we are. The world is so fresh to them. They are so inquisitive. I don't know what it is about it, but it is so sweet.

As you probably know, the twins pretty much spend 24/7 together. They eat together, play together, laugh and explore together. The other day, Billy took Brooklyn with him to run some errands so they were apart for a few hours. As soon as they arrived home, Billy IV threw his arms in the air and immediately started smiling and hugging Brooklyn. It is amazing to see how much he looks up to and loves his bigger sis. Ah you say, they are only one minute apart. But it is amazing to me how much I can tell that Brooklyn is big sis and Billy is little brother. It is so precious.

I was thrilled to receive a new journaling Bible and devotional book on Joy from my hubby as one of my Christmas gifts. We do the "12 days of Christmas" and try to get a gift for each other for each of the twelve days. Being a mommy of two 1 year olds, I feel like I am constantly moving, and I am trying to put extra effort into my spiritual life right now. It is so easy to get caught up in everything going on within our four walls, and I want to make sure that my focus is continually Christ-centered. After doing just one of the devotionals tonight, I already feel a sense of peace.

I am so exciting about spending this holiday season with our familes. This Thursday, we are heading down to Arab to have our immediate family's Christmas party. Then on Friday, we are having our extended family's Christmas get-together at my grandmother's house. On Saturday, we will be back in Lawrenceburg to go to Billy's grandparent's home for Christmas. And finally, We are planning to spend the night with Biff and Penny Saturday and Sunday night to celebrate the festivities further. We are so lucky to be blessed with two AMAZING families.

This year, it will be exciting because the twins will be aware of the gifts they are receiving and will be ready to play. Last year they were snoozing the whole time. haha

Here is to hoping for a happy and safe holiday season from our home to yours!

Look Whoo's Turning 1!!!

It feels like it has been a year since Billy and Brooklyn's birth in some ways, and then in other ways, it only seems like it has been a few weeks. I still remember everything about our visit to the doctor that day and then our subsequent admission to the hospital for the birth of our two sweeties. I still remember telling Billy to be sure his bag was packed and in the car. Mommy knew what was coming, daddy didn't. Haha He called his mother a few hours later, somewhat frantic, naming several items to try to locate in our house and to pack in a bag for him. lol I remember complementing our doctor on her scarf that day. Odd but true. I remember her looking rather surprised and telling me how much I had dilated, and that she could feel one of the twins feet. Sorry if that is TMI. I say that because when she said she didn't know which one it was, I knew. It was sweet Brooklyn, who, bless her heart, had been turned to the side the entire pregnancy and was rather tired of being cramped in mommy's tummy. I still remember the powerful feeling the night prior when she decided to get the process "moving" a bit. OUCH. :) She always was a big mover. I am so thankful to Billy for getting this picture of the twins and I following their birth. I wouldn't sell it for a million dollars. You may think I am teasing but I am completely serious. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and to me this one is worth a thousand smiles.



Our twins are incredibly different from one another, but they love each other very dearly. Ah yes, you say, "of course they do." ;) But it is true. They are each their own person, but I have had the blessing of seeing their affection for each other each day, and it is more dear to my heart then you could imagine. Now, that doesn't mean they don't compete in some fashions, or go after the same toy on more than one occasion throughout our mornings and afternoons at home, they are after all normal siblings, but at the end of the day they are each others number one fan. I have witnessed several moments of them this year smiling, holding hands, playing together, and so on. It has been amazing to watch them grow developmentally, physically and mentally each passing day. Here are a few of my favorite photos that capture their incredible bond.













I am continually mesmerized by the closeness they have been given the opportunity to share as a result of being twins. What a blessing it is, and I pray that they will always remain this close.

As I said earlier, our twins have completely different personalities in my opinion.

Brooklyn is strong-willed, independent, curious, and though she is only one, she is quite bright. Proud mommy syndrome...I know. She is very observant and always wants to know how things work. She has always been very interested in learning. Her eyes always light up and she smiles so big when we go through songs, read stories, or play with new toys. She will sit with me and pay close attention as I show her how toys work, and she catches onto things so quickly. She enjoys turning pages in her books and looking at the pictures. Recently she has started babbling to them in her own effort to read. It is so sweet. And while she is independent as I said earlier, she is just as much dependent on mommy. She typically sits right beside me during the day. I realized early that I would need that one on my side, and she certainly is. lol She is one minute older rules the roost as the saying goes. And I eat it up. Brooklyn loves to be with those that she knows best, and for most nights of the week, that includes bedtime. I have decided she really seems to "enjoy" our pillow top mattress and jersey sheets, nevermind that mommy is close by. She has become my "bed buddy" of sorts. And hey, as long as they are sleeping at night, I will do it any which of way. And I have to admit that I enjoy having one of them to cuddle with. But don't tell daddy!

Billy IV has such a kind, loving demeanor. I have always been able to tell how soft his heart is. He gives the sweetest, most gentle looks of anyone I have ever known. Frequently during the afternoon, I will be laying on the floor with them while they play, and Billy will crawl over and get on my back and give me a hug and a kiss. I don't prompt it, he typically just comes on over. I don't have to hear him say I love you to know that he does. He is my little mover, always on the go. He can go from 0-60 in a matter of seconds. He is constantly exploring, and is always surprising me with his level of intelligence. As we work on new words, I always find it funny that Billy doesn't have to watch my mouth or hear words over and over to repeat them. There have been many times that I will say a word one time while looking at an object, and Billy will be looking at the object at the time and just say it plain as day. He is also a soft one like his mommy. I contribute it to being the second born child like I am. As he gets older, I can tell he will be the one to ensure no one gets left out, or no one's feelings get hurt, etc. He entertains himself on his own for large parts of the day, observing different toys and seeing how they work. He has slept through the night for a few months now and it is SO nice!

I have learned a great deal over the past 12 months about our Lord, child-rearing, contentment, fulfillment, prayer, unconditional love, patience, lack of sleep (ha), and myself. It's funny how full your life can seem, and then enters two little ones, and you realize how empty it was prior. And more than that, how quickly you realize what truly is important and what needs to be tossed to the wayside. I still have a ways to go, but Brooklyn and Billy have taught me a great deal about being content with where I am and with what point my life is at. They have helped me to live in the moment and to not wish my life away to the next big thing. They have also have helped me to realize how strong I am emotionally and mentally. That may seem strange to point out, but I can say that after a full year with two infants with basically zero prior experience, and being solely on-call from 12:00 at night until 4:00 PM, mommy is a tough cookie. Especially since we have had a lot of sleep "issues." ;) I'm ready for my backrub dad. :) But I am lucky to have two little ones that have mostly taken it easy on me. They never were the type to just cry or to repeatedly fuss or whatnot (whew, lol). I am so thankful for what I have learned from and with them over the past 12 months. As the saying goes, we may not have it all together, but together we have it all.

As a mother of twins, and just as a mother in general, I have learned what seems like a million things concerning child-rearing. I have changed over a thousand diapers, fed them hundreds of bottles (I can pour four ounces of water in bottle without looking at the fill line. I can tell by the sound of the water filling the bottle when it reaches four ounces), I know that 200 rocks back and forth usually equals a sleeping baby. At least until you go to lay them down in the crib. ha I have learned to follow my intuition, and I now know that sleep isn't a requirement, it is a blessing. The list goes on and on...

This past Saturday we celebrated the twin's first birthday. Their theme was "Look Whoo's Turning One." It was so nice to spend a few hours with the people we are closest too and to celebrate the birthday of the two most precious people in my life. I am so thankful to our Lord for providing us with these two wonderful gifts!