The luckiest

I always hoped I would have twins. It’s funny the kinds of reactions you can get when people realize you have/are having twins. I have gotten everything from “bless your heart” to “you poor thing” to “what a blessing.” I always take each comment with a smile, and a bit of reflection, because I know how lucky I am.

Billy and Brooklyn are my two biggest accomplishments in my life, and also my two biggest blessings.

And in case you didn’t know it, they are the two most beautiful children in the world. And I’m not one bit partial so there is no argument there. :)

Someone passed on an exciting article to me a few days ago that discussed mothers of twins. It stated the following: “Researchers at the University of Utah report in the journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B that women who have twins are more likely to live longer, have more children over their lifetime and have offspring closer together, compared with women who had singletons...So rather than directly playing a role in longevity, having twins may be a marker of some yet unknown factor that leads to long life. "It's not that you can go out and have twins in order to live longer," says Smith. "It's more that twinning is a reflection of an innate feature that we can't yet identify that leads to longer life."

Talk about exciting news!!!

Before I had children, I was incredibly nervous to hold or interact with other people’s babies. I viewed it as such a huge responsibility. To put it in perspective, before we had the twins, I hadn’t changed a diaper since my sister’s seven year old son was a baby.

But it’s funny how naturally some things can come to you, and for those things that don’t, just pay close attention to Netty and Nenny and you will catch on.

Billy and Brooklyn are constantly teaching me things about themselves, this world, and about myself. I have decided to start keeping a list, some are funny, some are sentimental. Here are a few starters:

1. Baby poop really can smell that bad. :)
2. Girl babies can in fact pee on you more than boy babies. That is a total myth about boys.
3. For a girl that use to have a serious issue with spit or drool, it’s amazing how quickly I’ll grab some off a chin and wipe it on my pants or shirt. :)
4. The best smiles are the sleepy, fuzzy-haired smiles at the 3:30 AM feedings.
5. I can in fact sleep in 45 minutes increments for days at a time while the babies go through growth spurts, are teething, or are feeling a little restless.
6. My singing voice must not be as bad as I thought, because I sure get some sweet smiles when I sing “Leaving on a Jet Plane.” :)
7. I have super speed when it comes to feeding two babies solid food at the same time-SKILL.
8. Some babies like to go to sleep to a bottle and a nice fast rock. Some babies like to go to sleep by simply being laid down.
9. Baby Powder and Baby lotion= Purely blissful and calming scents.
10. Puppies fascinate babies. Billy and Brooklyn have been following Boo around with their eyes and Billy recently starting laughing at him when he is nearby.
11. Babies are incredibly observant, and way smarter than we imagine.

In closing, I must say that there is nothing quite like holding your son or daughter while they sleep as a baby. I may not know who they may marry one day, what their favorite color will be, what their favorite flavor of ice cream will be, what they will want to study in school, or what sports (if any) they will play…but in that moment, I know that they are safe, secure, and in the one person’s arms that love them more than anything or anyone in this world (Sorry Billy- I know you love them as much :)). It is INDESCRIBABLE.

Contentment

I have been thinking a lot about contentment these last few weeks. I have been amazed at how content I have become since the twins entered my world.

Webster’s dictionary defines contentment as the quality or state of being contented; the feeling or showing of satisfaction with one's possessions, status, or situation.

Naturally, contentment was paired with our own self-contentment (or self-satisfaction).

I’m a bit embarrassed to say that a little prior to the twins entering my life, I had started struggling to feel content with my life. I had started concentrating too much energy on looking to tomorrow, to the next big goal in my life, to what I would buy with my next paycheck, to thoughts of eventually building a house, to our next vacation trip….

But with time I discovered that such feelings don’t always end in a bad result, because in thinking through my thoughts and realizing the root of them, I began to understand that it wasn’t material possessions that I felt were missing in my life, it was our precious sweethearts that we now have.

It’s funny to me how God helps to prepare us for our next steps in life IF we allow him to. And more than that, how he doesn’t necessarily always give us our exact desires, but rather situations in which to develop these desires. For example, I prayed for patience (in general) for two years, and then God gave us twins. :) There is definitely some humor in that.

So why not simply be content with where we are in our lives? And if we aren’t content, then why not take time to process through the roots of our discontentment and to make changes as needed? I associate my level of contentment with my current relationship with God, so when I begin to feel discontent about something, I discern that my Christian walk needs a little work.

During the last few months, I have discovered a whole new level of contentment. It’s funny how a 4 month year old can teach you a thing or two. I find contentment in the smiles I receive when I scoop up one of our babies when they are moving around in their sleep and are ready to eat. I find contentment in the smell of Johnson’s lotion and baby powder. I find contentment in six sterilized bottles ready for the next round of feedings. I find contentment in watching Billy IV scrunch himself in a ball and get ready to roll over. I find contentment in hearing Brooklyn “talk to the fish” on her baby swing.

Thank you God for the level of contentment you have provided me with through our twins. Here’s to finding contentment in the little things!

Psalms 37:4 Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Hebrews 13:5 Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."

A little here and there

If how long it has been since I last blogged is any indication of how busy we have been since the birth of our twins, then my last blog being at 8 months pregnant should give you some sort of indication. :) While I don’t have time to recap each and every detail over the last 5 months (for fear I would never catch up to the present), I will recount the most memorable and meaningful moments over the last several months, starting on the day our twins entered into this world. Well, maybe just a little bit before then...

The last 4 weeks of my pregnancy with the twins were incredibly busy. We had baby showers three weekends in a row (October 24th, October 30th, and November 7th - my birthday). We are truly lucky to have family and friends that are so loving and generous, and I don’t think we would make it without them! During the last two weeks of my pregnancy I gained over 10 lbs in water weight, my blood pressure elevated, my platelet levels plummeted (from 130 million to 100 million-we needed at least 100 million for me to be able to have the c-section and to not have to be put to sleep for the birth of the twins), and I went to the bathroom, oh, about 30 times a day. haha Each time I would get up from the couch I would moan and groan (not of complaint) but because it was literally that hard for me to get up with how round my belly had gotten. Each time I would get up, Billy would look over with a concerned look and say “Babe, are you okay?” It was so funny! :)

So now let’s move on to the more important stuff.

-November 18th 2010-
On the morning of 11/18/2010, I knew the lives of Billy and I were about to change forever. I woke up extra early and grabbed a shower, then finished packing my hospital bag (just in case), and we headed to our 34 wk 5 day appointment. I told Billy he should go ahead and get his, to which he replied “Ah, if I were to need it I could always grab it later.” Mom to be tried to tell dad to be ready but I don’t think he was expecting everything to happen that day. At my appointment, the nurse checked my weight and I had gained an additional 3-4 lbs in water weight the last week. Then my doctor came in and said I had started dilating and that she thought “today was the day.” It’s hard to describe the amount of excitement, joy, and nervous energy I felt at that time. I could tell daddy-to-be was a little shocked that it was time! I called my family in Arab and we headed to Maury Regional. At the hospital, they got us into a room on the OB floor and hooked me up to the monitors to check on the twins. The babies were bouncing all over the place (they have always been good movers) and I could tell they were getting ready for their début. Before we knew it, our family had arrived and it was time!

I will never forget the birth of our babies. It is still surreal to think about and is forever etched in my mind. I remember taking the walk to the delivery room with a nurse by my side. I remember looking down at my bright yellow hospital socks (they were unforgettable) as they put my spinal tap in. I remember the nurse holding my head in her arms to help me stay relaxed. I remember saying a prayer that the babies and I would be okay. I remember the anesthesiologist rubbing my forehead and talking me through the next series of events. I remember Billy walking around the delivery table and holding my hand while asking if I was okay. I remember the doctor telling me it was time to begin. I remember the doctor saying I had a belly full of babies…

….And then I remember hearing the sweetest, most gentle sound I have ever heard. Little Brooklyn had made her arrival! She voiced her hello as they brought her around for me to see. As she rounded the corner, I could tell she sensed where mommy was as she gazed in my direction.

Then it was precious Billy IV’s turn.

I remember the doctor laughing as Billy kicked away when she went to deliver him. He wasn’t quite ready for his exit. Then I remember hearing yet another sweet, gentle cry from our baby boy. Before I knew it, I had two babies wrapped up and laying at my side. Billy was softly sleeping and Brooklyn Rose was blowing bubbles for me while humming about her experience.

Brooklyn Rose was born at 6:49 PM and weighed 5 lbs 7 oz. Billy IV was born at 6:50 PM and weighed 5 lbs 13 oz.

The amount of love I felt at that time was almost overwhelming. It is the same amount of love I feel today, and it seems that with each passing moment it grows that much more. There in the delivery room it was as though I had a whole new chamber that had opened in my heart that was completing overflowing with love, joy, compassion, and devotion to our babies. I have never felt God working more closely in my life then in that moment.

Initially they thought both babies were completely healthy and would be just fine on their own, but after a few days Billy IV was placed in the NICU due to having eating and digestion difficulties. It was incredibly difficult to see him hooked up to the IV and monitors that enabled the doctors and nurses to keep a watchful eye on him. At first they thought he would have to be transported to Vanderbilt, but within a matter of a couple of days he made a complete turn around and began eating increasing amounts of food. At first he was only able to keep down 1 of 7 ccs (30 ccs is an oz), but within a few days he was keeping 30 ccs and then 45 ccs down. I am so thankful that we have a God that loves us and watches over us and took care of our Billy at that time.

The twin’s date of birth is of huge sentimental value to me. 11/18 is my Maw Sutton’s birthday. She was my great grandmother and passed away several years ago, but I always adored her as a child and felt extremely close to her. More than that, she was responsible for raising my mother in the church and who I have to thank for my faith and involvement with the church. Maw Sutton was watching over us that day and the moment I learned it was her birthday I immediately relaxed because I knew everything would be okay.

-Now back to the present-
The last few months have been a whirlwind. Between waking every 3 hours to feed each baby for the first six weeks, to changing 16 diapers a day, to cuddling and rocking our sweethearts gently to sleeo, and taking time for each other, Billy and I have been very busy. The babies have just begun sleeping in their cribs and they are doing such a great job. The last two nights they have slept from 12:00 PM until 6:00 AM and then went back to sleep until 9:30 AM or so. It is AMAZING. Billy rolled over at 4 months, 1 day and Brooklyn Rose rolled over at 4 months, 3 day. Billy is continuously rolling all over the place and Brooklyn rolls over “when she sees the need to.” I am excited to see that they are reaching developmental milestones around the same time but I also realize they are their own person and will each do things when they get ready. We have such good babies and they are such a blessing to us. I am so thankful for them and will never take these precious gifts for granted. So there we are…a recap of the past 4-5 months! Now let’s see how long I can keep this blog updated…

Things I have learned thus far during Pregnancy:

Wow! Second post in one day! I have started to compose a list of things I have discovered as a result of pregnancy. I am sure I will add to this list as the weeks go by but here is a good starting point! :)

1) Whoever made up the saying “eat two crackers before your head leaves the pillow” as a cure for morning sickness was NOT pregnant with twins.

2) I can’t vouch for moms that are pregnant with singletons (though I am sure it is similar), but I think moms who work full time while expecting twins should be applauded every Monday that they decide to go to work after the 25 week mark. I figure if you start the week that should mean you can finish the week. Matter of fact, I held a moment of applause for myself as I crossed my husband’s path in the hallway after getting out of bed this morning and he gave me a grin.

3) Getting sick four times a day from weeks 5-12 will actually not make you go crazy, and because you are so excited about being a mommy, it won’t even make you cry. You just do it.

4) Nothing can describe or take the place of the feeling you get when you feel two babies moving in your tummy. This is especially precious when you turn off your alarm in the morning and feel a gentle tap on one side of your tummy followed by a gentle tap on the other side of your tummy as though the twins are saying “good morning mommy.”

5) Absentmindedness is a true pregnancy symptom. I can’t count how many times I have lost my keys or phone during the pregnancy. Yes, I know, I lost them several times before the pregnancy, but now it happens at least twice daily. Thank goodness I have a patient husband who will help me look for my keys and call my phone when I misplace it for the millionth time!

6) Sleeping while sitting up against the backrest of the couch becomes a normal occurrence during the second (and I am sure third) trimester. Indigestion. Indigestion. Indigestion.

7) If you attend a Tennessee football game while pregnant with a son that is just like his father, you will sense how upset he is when Tennessee makes a mistake. No joke. An Oregon player got an interception and ran it back for a touchdown during the game this past weekend and Baby Billy hit his fists against my tummy the entire time the Oregon player was running towards the end zone.

8) It is important to appreciate the full control you have over your children while they are in the womb. It is so nice to know exactly where they are and pretty much exactly what they are doing. For instance, this week the twins are beginning to open and close their eyes and are setting their own individual cycles of sleep and wakefulness. Let’s just say Brooklyn is a night owl like her mama. I hear this control is quickly diminished/changed after they are born so I am eating it up right now. ;)

9) Ice chips may not do anything for you during the first trimester, but starting around 24 weeks they are miraculous. I am constantly chomping ice (and probably annoying those around me).

10) Despite how laid back you may be prior to pregnancy (and I consider myself an extremely laid back person), you WILL become more dramatic during pregnancy. The important thing is to always keep yourself in check and to run your exaggerative-ness by a close friend to ensure that it is worthy of the drama production you are putting on. If you think it is but your friend says it isn’t, just get a second opinion. You can always find someone who will tell you what you want to hear.

11) It’s amazing how quickly you begin to develop a mothering instinct during pregnancy and how protective you become of your babies. If you experience the good side of this, it could mean me making you cookies “just because.” If you experience the bad side of this, it could mean me correcting you and telling you to straighten up if I see something is amiss.

12) Foods you have aversions to during the first trimester become the foods you love during the ladder second trimester. For the first 16 weeks (I kept a calendar) of my pregnancy I could not even look at chocolate, now I am having to express some self-control.

13) Enjoy the attention you get during pregnancy, but remember that this attention will be transferred to the babies (as it should be) when they arrive in the world. Be very wary of this, because people tend to do everything for you when you are expecting, and you must remember that it will be YOU that will go to work full time when the babies get here (See, I am coaching myself for the near future)….Disclaimer: this statement does not include the occasional assistance and guidance you will receive from individuals who go by the names of Brenda and Penny… you know who you are...

14) If you are a self-labeled tomboy who loves sports, loafers, and video games as much or more than most males you know, you will still melt and fall in love with all the purples and pinks you can (and will) buy for a baby girl. Brooklyn already has several prissy jackets and dresses for the future.

15) Your pets know when you are expecting. Boo use to go to bed at 12:00 at night, he has now started going to bed at 10:00. I think he must be preparing for the future.

16) Insomnia comes with the territory. I have always been a night owl, but I could easily stay up until all hours of the night. My doctor giggled when I told her about this newest symptom and she said “nature has a way of preparing you for the future.”

17) When you become pregnant, that desire for a mini cooper or Audi tt roadster becomes a thing of the past and all you really want is an SUV with third row seating or a crossover of some sorts. It even sounds way more exciting to you!

Less than 3 months until the twins are here!

It's hard to believe the twins will be here in less than three months! Our scheduled induce date is December 11th, which was three months from this past Saturday. I am predicting that they will come during late November though! I wouldn't be surprised if I went into labor during the Alabama/Auburn game. Seriously! Our last dr's visit went really well! My blood pressure was 110/70 and I have officially entered into the 150lb weight division for the first time ever. haha I weighed in at 151 lbs. :) Hard to believe that I am suppose to gain roughly 20 more lbs in the next several weeks. My "What to Expect When You Are Expecting" book tells me to enjoy my time now as my tummy size will likely double over the next month or two. Looking down, I can't imagine that! Looks like I better enjoy these last few moments of food before the indigestion becomes unbearable. haha The twins have been growing really well so far! I always get really anxious/nervous before their ultrasounds bc I want to see that they are gaining weight really well. During this past visit on September 8th, Brooklyn Rose weighed in at 1 lb 10 oz and Billy Ray weighed in at 1 lb 11 oz. I was so proud of them! Billy was yet again facing right toward the camera :) Brooklyn was faced more towards the side and appeared to be "doing her own thing." Brooklyn is our "active" twin. She is constantly moving her arms and legs. Billy is a little quieter and I tend to feel him most when I wake up in the morning or when it's time to eat. I am not drawing any conclusions on their personalities however because I have read a lot of material on babies here lately and it seems that often times really active fetuses are calm babies, whereas calm fetuses are really active babies. Who knows! Right now I am thinking Brooklyn is our independent gal and Billy is our relaxed soul. We shall see!

This past weekend we went to the Tennessee vs Oregon game. I really enjoyed it! I am so thankful to have such wonderful in-laws! The twins are going to love them! I can picture Mama H being so delicate and soothing with them and Daddy H being the one to always get them laughing and sneaking them candy when they get a little older. :) I can picture my mom being so soft and listening intently to them and my dad tickling them with his mustache or taking them for a ride on the John Deer. I can only hope to do half the job my mom has done raising me and Billy's mom has done raising him. We have some big shoes to fill to say the least :) Best advice I ever gathered from my mom during my childhood is to treat each child, no matter what their age, as though they are individuals and "small adults" per say....to remember that what is big in their world may seem insignificant to us in our adult world, but to remember to view it on the same level of importance that they do. It always felt good to know that my mom would never dismiss or diminish the way I felt or the value that I placed on certain things during my childhood.

I bought the twins a glider today! I laughed after I purchased it because I realized I have something to rock the twins in, but I don't have anything for them to sleep in yet. :) First things first, we have to get their nursery painted! I think we have decided on a soft green color. It is a very soothing color! I told Billy we need to have their room completely finished over the next four weeks. Slowly but surely I am trying to get the house prepared! I can't wait to meet the twins! The other day I showed Billy two onesies mom had gotten for the twins and he draped the pink one over his shoulder as to imitate holding Brooklyn, and I just about melted in a million pieces...I can't wait to experience their birth with him and to see the expression on his face when he sees them for the first time...despite my worries and fears regarding the whole birthing process, I absolutely can't wait for our family to reach that milestone. God has truly blessed us!

!6 Weeks and Counting!

We are officially four months pregnant! The time has flown by, and it is hard to believe in six months or less we will have two bundles of joy to love! This past Thursday I had to be put in the hospital due to having Ketones. They kept me over night and I was released Friday afternoon. This resulted due to dehydration after excessive nausea and vomiting. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't keep fluids down! I am currently seeking out those individuals who told me nausea would officially subside after the first trimester. :) One fhing is for sure, these babies are absolutely worth it. I will experience anything for those two!

So far I haven't had a lot of food cravings, but certainly a lot of food aversions. I thought I would start a list and add to it as I go along, so here we are:

FOOD CRAVINGS:

Anything grape flavored, ranch dressing, pizza, PICKLES (including the juice), squash casserole, spaghetti, regular chips, steak, Junior roast beefs from Arby's, Lemon water

FOOD AVERSIONS:

Chicken fingers (used to be my favorite), french fries, ANYTHING sweet (the twins send it back nearly everytime), certain cheeses, hamburger steak, ice cream, most fish or seafood items

My third doctor's visit went really well! My blood pressure was 110/80 and I had gained 3.5 lbs! I have now gained 9 pounds so far and they have recommended 45-50 lbs for twins. We heard both baby's heartbeats and at this visit they were 154 (Baby B) and 152 (Baby A). I must say that hearing their heartbeats is simply the most amazing feeling I have ever experienced. On August 9th we will get the "long" ultrasound and get to find out their genders (fingers crossed). I am SO ready to be able to refer to them by gender and name. The most important thing is that they are healthy though! I must say I would LOVE any combination of genders. Boys to take care of their mama, girls to rule the house with, or one of each!!!

Surprise!!! We are expecting twins!!!

Okay, so I realize it has been a little too long since my last blog post, but hey, give this girl a break...in the last couple of weeks my husband and I found out we are having TWINS! I can't say I'm entirely shocked...I had three tale-tale signs. 1) One of the symptoms of twins is quote "extreme morning sickness"...and I have to say, after rushing to the bathroom 3-4 times a day for the past 7 weeks, I have officially met that criteria. 2) I started showing a wee bit at 8 weeks...luckily the weight wasn't going to my tail (keeping my fingers crossed) so I didn't let it bother me....and 3) I distinctly remember riding home with my dad at night one time when I was between the ages of 9-12, and we were talking about how his grandmother was a twin, and all I could think about was, wow, wouldn't it be awesome to carry on that kind of heritage? :)

Well, roughly 10 years later, here we are!!! It's hard to believe that we are roughly a third of our way through the pregnancy! It has been such a blessing! It's hard to describe how much love I already have for them, each individually, and how much I can't wait to meet them. The babies are in seperate sacs so it is more than likely that they are fraternal twins (unless they seperated within the first three days of conception). That means more than likely, if they are fraternal, they will have 50% of their genes in common, like my sisters and I or any other siblings...the difference is with them being the same age, they are more likely to look even more similiar :).

If you are wondering if I am going to dress them alike, the answer is : Absolutely yes!!! BUT only at first. I want to ensure we support their independence and individuality once they are old enough. This will be super easy if they are different genders. I want as many matching-hat outfits as I can find. :) haha

When we had the ultrasound and the nurse let us know we were having twins, Billy and I immediately looked at each other and started giggling. There I was concerned about ensuring we heard that first little heartbeat, and we were blessed with TWO. It was amazing to see them floating around in there. Baby A was waving hello and Baby B was turning flips. I couldn't stop laughing! I saw a few tears in Billy's eyes and all I could think about was how much love was in the room, and how many incredible blessings God has provided us with...it is truly amazing to think about!!! More to come soon!!!